Jučer su Jadranka Kosor i Željko Kerum potpisali koalicijski sporazum. Aktualna premijerka pritom je izjavila da tim činom žele okupiti “SVE KOJI MISLE HRVATSKI”.Ja sam odmah, čim sam to čuo, pomislio: “Ou, shit!”
I onda sam nastavio misliti ovako: Is there any other way to think if one has been born in Croatia, if Croatian is one’s native language? I mean, you can try hard to think in English, Spanish, Catalonian, German… but it is not the real thing, because only when you think in Croatian you can think in a truly proper, integral way.
I kad sam to zaključio, pomislio sam: Maybe Mrs Prime Minister talks nonsense? And then I remembered how poorly she speaks English, and how Kerum simply shines when he speaks his own native languge, and then her statement suddenly seemed so sincere. However, I failed to see one thing: how the rest of us, those outside their coalition, are going to think from now on?
I pošto mi to, dakle, nije jasno, nastavio sam razmišljati: Since I am not part of their coalition, should I really think in English? And for how long? Only today, or as the Prime Minister would put it, “the day after yesterday”? Until the elections are over? Or even after the elections? Am I supposed to carry my English dictionary around if I cannot think of some word? Because, you know, that would be totally impractical.
I onda me zaboljela glava od toliko razmišljanja na engleskom pa sam zaključio da je Kosoričina izjava ipak malo pretjerana, da ne kažem demagoška, da ne kažem potpuno netočna. Jer, nećemo se svi mi, kojima je materinji jezik hrvatski i koji mislimo hrvatski, okupiti u toj novoj Kerum-Kosor koaliciji. To me dovelo do pitanja zašto bi premijerka i Kerum imali ekskluzivno pravo na naš jezik? Takvo svojatanje nečega što nam svima jednako i prirodno pripada je, u najmanju ruku, nepristojno.
I onda sam, baš za inat, nastavio ful jako misliti hrvatski. Ono, baš jako, o svemu i svačemu – i cijelo vrijeme sam baš pazio da mi ni slučajno ne uleti u mišljenje neka strana riječ. I nije mi uletila. I neće. Jer ja stvarno kad mislim, najlakše i najbolje mislim – hrvatski.
Tekst: V.Obersnel